New Beginning

I've moved. No not countries, or cities, or houses for that matter.

I've moved blogs. My new one is

http://carrawhiteley.wordpress.com/

so please join me there instead of here.

Thanks for reading for the last time here.

-Carra

Lessoned Learned Today:

Indonesian Shopping;

Tonight is Prom Night for my older brother, and yes, it was up to me to order the corsages. Three of them, for his friends dates as well. We had previously had a sample made, so they already knew how to make it, and what ribbons, flowers, bracelets, etc. to use. The originals ones were beautiful, and perfect to match everyone's dress and desires. I paid and left, my mind full of thoughts that did not relate to flowers. A few hours later, the corsages arrive at our house. Of course, they were not as good as the first ones. They had few flowers one them, and were NOT the same as the first one, they even replaced the bracelet with another ribbon.

The lesson learned today was: In Indonesia, never pay without receiving the product first, because it will be different.

Over a Month

Its been over a month.

Yes, five weeks.

Why?

Well, Im not entirely sure. Could it be that I haven't had internet? Possibly, yes. It was a busy month, filled with me contemplating whether of not I should continue my blog. To tell the truth, I did consider shutting down, and forgetting completely that this blog existed. The reasons for this? I usually feel bad, my posts are super inconsistent, and somewhat, well, boring. Hopefully, my posts will get better, and I won't continue to go long spans of time without blogging anything. As I sit here at Starbucks, I look around me. It's raining, I'm listening to my favorite music, sipping my tall Hazelnut Latte. I realize, life is what we make of it. We control our thoughts, and what we make of each situation in our life. Everything, for the most part, is up to us.

Expectations

Life is so much easier without expectations. If we don't expect anything from someone, its easier to accept them without judgment. No expectations allows a more enjoyable life, as there are no let downs. You cant expect the worst or the best, because you don't expect anything.

Live without expectations, it's that simple.

Guiltlessly Satisfied, Enforceable Happiness, Regretlessly Living,

I've been thinking a lot lately about a load of unanswerable questions, random thoughts drifting through my head at any given time. I'm sure this happens to everyone, but it's up so our minds to break it down and look further into the situation. Breaking down each piece and expanding on it in our heads.

What does it mean to be Guiltlessly Satisfied? It can be interpreted in many different ways.

To put it simple, it's being satisfied, without feeling guilty about it. A small example, fulfilling your sweet tooth by eating ice cream, and not feeling guilty that you ate it, because you didn't exercise that day. It's meeting your own person needs, but doing so in a way that doesn't cause you to feel wrong about your actions. A way to do this, think before you act. Now, I'm not saying be super careful about every single little action you do, so it leads to paranoia. But instead, fulfill yourself, meet your minds desires, but not to an extent that causes you to get that feeling of regret. Regret is such a strong word, and the feeling can last for years. Act in ways that are Guiltlessly Satisfying in your life.

Everyone has faked a smile, or lied and said they were 'fine', everyone has pretending to joyful, faking everything as they go. But underneath that beaming person, there is sorrow, undesirable emotions, tears that are itching to be shed. What does it take to drive out that misery and replace it with uncontrolled, bursting-at-the-seams happiness? A challenge for you is to obtain Enforceable Happiness. This means you are not a mere actor, going through a playbook of rehearsed lines that convince others that you are okay. This means that you've acquired a full sense of Happiness, inward and outward.

Lastly, live a regretless life. Don't waste time committing actions that you know will hang over you for years. Don't go through life lying through your teeth, telling yourself that no matter what you do, it's okay. Truth is, it's not. People do thing that they regret. It's a part of life. But instead of beating yourself up for it, see these events as learning opportunities. Opportunities to set goals for yourself, opportunities to realize what you need to change, opportunities to become more aware of who you are. Most importantly, opertunities to make your life more enjoyable and meaningful to yourself and others around you. Believe it or not, your regrets can affect how you act with yourself and others. So don't cause yourself to go into a state of denial because you know you did something wrong. No one is perfect. And Regretlessly Living will help you discover that, and help you unearth the true beauties of what having a Happy, Satisfied, Regretless life is all about.

KotaKinbaluPictures

Some of the pictures of Spring Break in Kota Kinabalu (no hiking ones yet)

More to be posted later.

till next time....

xx

Realization of the Day

"It's because I live in Indonesia"

one of the biggest excuses I use now-a-days

example.

:takes five days for the people to come to fix the sink "its because I live in Indonesia"

:people that I don't even know are hanging out in my driveway

:people are standing in the middle of the road directing traffic, and wanting to get paid for it

:when eating out at restaurants, one person could get their food 30 minutes before someone else

:when shopping and ask for something in a different size, or ask for a taxi outside the hotel, basically anything involving asking for something, I am asked to "please sit first"

the world around me is completely different that what I know and consists of so many elements that I will never be able to wrap my head around.

the power inside

Everyone has been in a competition of some sort. It's human nature to be competitive. To have a will to win! But where does that will come from?

When running races, that will always comes out, depending on whether or not I allow it to. I always start off strong, with high hopes. Hopes that this will be the best run of my life. But half the time that desire is not fulfilled. Part of running the race is technique, strategy, planning. It is up to me to choose how to plan my run. Being a good runner means not losing technique under pressure, which I cannot claim to being consistent in that. To tell the truth, my mind goes blank when nervousness takes over. Technique definitely isn't the first thing on my mind. Remembering this, I tend to go all out at the beginning, causing me to be tired sooner than I should be.

This is where the will, the power, the hope, kicks in. Somehow, deep inside, I find that to want to win somewhere inside, pull it out, and use it to the best of my ability. Whether it be making a personal best, or catching the girl in front of me, or simply just feeling good about my race, it comes out, and helps me complete the desired.

Everyone has this passion inside of them. No matter where it may come in life, its there. The will is not some random feeling, it is us, coming from us, and being used for us. No one else is running the race for us, it's our power. Drive out that passion and use it, take advantage of it, and allow it to help you win the race. Find it, adore it, make the best of it.

So, as I finish up, I encourage you to dig out that passion, and use it for whatever you can. Even if it be the smallest thing, or a life changing event, don't waste the will power inside of you. Do everything to the best of your ability, and don't blank out when you are put on the spot. Remain strong and consistent through everything you do.

sharing of news- good and bad.

good news: my computer is fixed! more blogging!

bad news: all hard drive wiped, lost all pictures :( no more of indonesia to share. but hopefully i can take some more soon

just got back from trip, sorry no recent blogs, but will post about it soon! :)

-

Concrete Bed

Concrete Bed

Hard, cold lonely,

the concrete as his bed,

loud, noisy scared,

the highway as his roof,

sky, pollution, air,

as his walls and protection,

newspaper, clothes, body,

as this warmth,

scraps, bits, starvation,

as his food,

blisters shroud his shoeless feet,

sores cover his hands,

hunger fills his stomach,

longing fills his soul,

sorrow fills his heart,

alone, in the dark world,

nothing, no one, thoughts his only companion,

homeless, wanders, nomad,

pondering on wether he will be alive to face tomorrow.

Edits: One morning I went on a run with my dad, I saw some people sleeping on the side of the road- I will have a post more detailed later. But it inspired me to write this. Its a typical thing to see here, and makes me thankful everyday for what I have. I wrote it about a year and a half ago.

A Time of Silence

Although Jakarta isn't a Hindu based city, any excuse to take a holiday is a valid one. So what's the reasoning behind our vacation today? Nyepi, a Hindu day of silence. It's a day to sit and reflect on life and beliefs. But in order to do this, no noises or movements can be made in fear that the evil spirits might find you.
Part of living overseas, or pretty much anywhere, is being able to accept others religious differences. Of course we won't agree with what everyone else chooses to believe, this is where acceptance comes in. Acceptance isn't just dealing with other people's differences, but it is choosing to be okay with them. It is not discriminating against a person, for being the person they choose to be. Face the facts, and choose to live with them. Be open, accepting, and loving towards others, just as you want others to do to you.

Bazaar Photos :)

Bazaar

March 4th, 2010, we had the Halliburton Ladies Bazaar, and thankfully it is over with. We sold quite a few products, and soaps that we made went super super fast. I could not be more happy that the felting is over, well, untill the new batch arrives. Then we will be making scarves, and a billion more soaps. Brianna and I will also try our hand at candle making- lets hope that goes well. :) Here are some pictures from the bazaar, there arent very many though because we were usually working. The next one is the last week in April, so there will be a little bit of time to relax until then. :)

Busy Bee

Sorry it's been quite a while since I've posted. The major reason- my computer broke. The minor reason- Ive been super super busy ( and still am, but really, aren't we all?) But i felt like I should give you something, cuz I really don't wanna go back into that spell that causes me to not write for months.
The reason behind my buisiness (besides schoool and everyday track): the Halliburton Women Bazaar, on Thursday, March 4th. My friend and I have been making items to sell at the bazaar. The main one, wool bowls. It's quite a long process and requires lots of water and soap and wool, and most of all scrubbing like there's no tomorrow. But after the bowls were done, we couldn't stop. Now we have wool coasters, silk coasters, and these amazing soaps that have wool around them (its like a loofah), they're great. Apart from that, she is a jewelry maker! and I have been doing stationary, and pictures! The pics are great and maybe I will post a few. I've already sold some, so I can't wait to see who else will be interested! Also, and I think lastly, we have necklaces made out of ultra-suede.
It's been about three weeks, and my hands are pruned to the bone. But due to all the soap, squeaky squeaky clean. All resulting in huge muscles for both of, because trust me, after hours of work and scrubbing, our arms were tireeddd!!
Thankfully this will all pay off on Thursday, and after that I will have all the free posting time in the world. I'll put up some pics of the bazaar and our awesome products. :) :) wish us luck!
Stay Tuned
- The girl whose trying to do it all, but not succeeding

my question for you:

"Do you ever finish something, and know you could have done ten times better, but realize you won't get another chance?"

Life's Hurdles

Track and Field seems to pretty much take up most of my time, and today I tried Hurdles for the first time. I discovered a few things, but the most prominent was that it is not as easy as it looks. But it made me realize, life is like a 400 meter Hurdles race. You start of uneven, unbalanced, until you can get the feel for it and adapt to the race. Then you start jumping too high, over achieving, you feel like your doing so good so you start doing TOO good. Eventually, you learn your height and balance it out. You have controlled aggression, you're attacking the hurdle full on. You are under control, doing great. But by now, you are up to the 200 mark. Half way, holding up well, but t your back leg starts to falter. Your tired, and you are drawing it straight under you instead of brining it to the side. This is the middle of life, its been going good but its coming crashing down. You feel like you cant go any further, you've given the crowd (your friends and family) a good start, and a great first half, but you just don't want to do it anymore. You start to give up. You're ready for it to be over, so you stop. Start kicking down the hurdles, because going over them just doesn't seem like an option anymore.

But there are only 100 meters left, the last stretch. Encouragement from others fills your ears. And you realize, this is it. This stretch is all I've got. Adrenaline over takes you. Your feet just start going, and going, and going. Your hurdling over all of them likes theres no tomorrow. Your whole body is in synch. It. Couldn't. Feel. More. Right. Your arms are swinging, you're only inches about the hurdle, each part working together. Its over, you made it! It's done. Your adrenaline is over, your body is drained, and you await recovery. But you still have this moment to hold onto.

Admist all of this, there is always the biggest factor of Hurdles. The Fear. It comes and goes. Sometimes we think we master it, but later on the fear will return. We try to fight it, and sometimes can't take it. Even when we think its gone, the fear is still lingering, and always will. We may think we've overcome it, but just like life, there is always going to be fear of something. The fear will change from one aspect to another. But. It's. Always. There. Even if we don't realize it.

A Mardi Gras Valentines- My first ever self-made king cake

It's been about 5 years since we've lived in Louisiana, and boy do we miss it! :(

So this Valentines Day my mom and I decided to make a King Cake from the fabulous kitchen of Chef Emeril Lagasse, the Zeus of cajun cooking! Little did we know, we were embarking on a 4 hour journey filled with flour, dough, and gold, purple, and green sprinkles. Amidst all of this, mom was cooking red beans and rice, to carry on the cajun feel. It was a mad house in the kitchen, but the thought of a succulent King Cake drew us to perseverance. The result: utter joy. Pure deliciousness. Explosion of taste. Flat. Out. Yummy-ness. Take a look- and yes, it is okay to wish you had a piece.

Valentines Day

Valentines Day is a day for one to express their love. Share it with one another, spread it to each other. Flowers, chocolate, heart shaped candies, all used as a symbol to show how we really feel. But why is it only one day a year? Why do we single out one day as a day to be kind?

Valentines Day should be a 365 day holiday, a year lasting time of love.

Share it.

Spread it.

Use it.

Love it.

"But before all else, a work of art is the creation of love. Love for the subject first and for the medium second. Love is the fundamental necessity underlying the need to create, underlying the emotion that give it form, and from which grows the unfinished product that is presented to the world. Love is the general criterion by which the rare photography is judged. It must contain it to be not less than the best of which the photographer is capable."Eliot Porter

Bring it On Home

It's approximately 7:53 am on Monday morning, and my loving parents allowed me to skip first block to watch the Saints vs. Vikings game. We need this game to make to the Superbowl!

So, to all Saints fans out there- just letting you know you have support across the globe.

And to the Saints- bring it on home baby!

Lets spread some GOLD and BLACK love!

cutest ever ♥

I love stationary- actually its more than love, its an obsession! You can never have too much of it!

Well, after discovering that Singapore Borders was closing now Paperchase, my favorite stationary shop, in which I excitedly waited for those trips to Singapore so I could get my hands on the latest design, I was quite devastated. It was being replaced by DQco, a very cute new thing, and measurable cheaper, but still didn't have the significance of my Paperchase. In perfect timing, (the trip before) I discovered a stationary shop called kikki.K, its ADORABLE and ten billion times cuter than Paperchase, it's the next level- a major step-up, like going from the beat up Pick- up truck, to the nice new Dodge with leather seats and 4-wheel drive. I officially know where I will be headed as soon as I land, and spending my money with pride. kikki.K is Swedish, and makes everyday useful items adorable- but also has the specialties as well. Even the store itself was cute.

Please, I hope you enjoy it as much as I do, click here to start the most epic stationary journey of your life.

City of Lights

Paris was always my dream city. I was the kid who watched movies like Ratatouille, and wished I were a rat just so I could go there. Well because of my fabulous mother, I got to go there over the summer. It was one of the best trips of my life. We ate pesto Escargot, went to all the art Museums. Saw the Mona Lisa, took a boat on the Seine river, Notre Dame. And just enjoying the streets and living the french lifestyle. We also got to ride bikes in Versailles, and Monet's garden, also around the city. Most my favorite thing had to of been searching for the Eiffel Tower all night. We used its light to guide us as we walked through the streets of Paris. Once we arrived, we waiting in line for hours. But being on top of the tower was one of the most amazing places I have ever been. Even better, at night, each hour of the clock the tower sparkles and twinkles. We saw it twinkle at every hour until they kicked us off at midnight! It was fabulous! The food was delicious, I ate way to much! It was definitely the trip of a lifetime!

Nepal

In November I had the wonderful opportunity of going to Nepal for a school trip. There were 20 kids, all freshman, and two adults. We were guided by Nepalese men, through the Himalayan Mountains. It was the most beautiful place I have ever been, and definitely an opportunity I will probably never be offered again. We based in Kathmandu- the capital, and took a bus. Then we started the hike, going up gradually. One day only a portion of the hike was 7,000 uphill steps, and they were super steep. But we just kept going up and up. Each night we would stay in a lodge, only a few bedrooms, all sharing the same bathroom. We were lucky if we got a hot shower- so there was always a fight over who got to go first! We had porters that would carry our big duffle bags on their backs, each bag weighing about 20 kilos, and they would carry 3 or 4. The other porters carried our food for lunch, which they made everyday. Noodles and nan bread, which was good because it was freezing, and we always looked forward to the warm noodles to rejuvenate our bodies.

One morning we woke up about 5.15, to hike to the top of Poon Hill- about 3,210 meters high. It was so cold, and really dark, so we were struggling to stay warm. Everyone was complaining the whole way up, until the sun started to rise above the mountains. It was truly an amazing moment, and we all were astounded at the beautiful sight around us. Words cannot describe what we saw- nor can picture, it is something you have to experience first hand. Once we got to the top of the hill (which was more like a mountain if you ask me), all worries of the world disappeared, it was just you, and the mountains. The famous Annapurna Mountain Range of the Himalayas surrounded us. It felt as if we were on top of the world! Given the choice, I would have stayed up there forever!

Edits: Pictures without my logo are credited to Hannah Wolff